Posts Tagged ‘bear’

Bear hunting

Thursday, July 16th, 2009

There once was a bear hunter who was having no luck in finding his quarry. All at once, he felt a tap on his shoulder from behind. It was a huge grizzly bear.

The hunter’s shock was increased when the bear spoke to him. “You are hunting me, I’ll bet”, said the bear. “You may choose your punishment. Either I will maul you to death or fuck you up the arse!”

The hunter didn’t want to die, so he consented to give the bear the pleasure of his booty. The bear left satisfied and the hunter returned to his cabin.

The next day, the hunter decided to kill the bear for revenge. But, as luck would have it, the grizzly found him first. Once again, the hunter felt the tap on his shoulder and the bear made his request. The hunter dropped his pants, bent over, and took what the beast had to offer.

The third day, the hunter was really irate and decided he would torture and kill that bear! Once more, though, the bear was the better hunter. When the man felt the familiar tap on his shoulder, he expected to hear the grizzly’s offer of a choice again, but this time the bear just said, “I am starting to think you aren’t really comming for the hunt, are you?

The bear, the rabbit and the golden fish

Tuesday, June 30th, 2009

The rabbit and the bear were fishing one day. Suddenly the bear caught the golden fish. She asked them to let her go, and she will fulfill three wishes to each of them. Of coures they did and she asked what their wishes are.
“I want all the bears in this forest to be female!” said the bear
“I want a helmet” sait the rabbit
“Done”, said the fish. “What’s number two?”
“I want all the bears in the entire continent to be female!” said the bear
“I want a motorcycle”, asked the rabbit
“Done too. What will be the last one?” asked the golden fish
“I want ALL the bears on the entire Earth to be female!!!” asked the bear
And the rabbit’s last wish was
“And I want the bear to be gay!”